Thursday, February 6, 2014

I am great how are you?

...I usually respond to peoples questions about how I am rather then responding with the truth.  Sound familiar to you?  Most people really don't care how I feel they are just asking to be polite so I try to be polite too!  I wonder how they would respond if I really answered them truthfully with how I feel?  Let me think on this a second and I will tell you exactly and truthfully how I feel today...

It is after 2 pm (I didn't get to bed till 6 am cause of the pain and brain issues last night) and I just rolled out of bed so my brain is still very foggy and I am having difficulty putting thoughts together.  I am having to type/erase because unlike my iPad this computer doesn't have spell correct and I am not spelling well but to use the iPad causes me problems when I try to post.   Please excuse any typographical errors that spell check doesn't pick up.   How do I brains very foggy, back hurts from my neck down my spine, arthritis is effecting my joints and the fibro is causing me to feel like I have a horrible achiness all over my body.  My head is hurting a little bit because of the bright lights of the screen and the brilliant light from the outside due to all the snow on the ground.  My mouth is dry and eyes feel scratchy due to the Sjogren's syndrome that is secondary to all the other crap.  My fingers feel like sausages but don't look swollen and my legs and feet are all achey and cramping but I don't want the doctor to know cause I don't want to go up on my meds.   So all in all how to I feel today?  Bitchy and I want to go back to bed even though I haven't been up a half hour.   I don't do pain meds because they don't work for me so I try alternative things to make it better...that and doing the mind over matter thing!

If I am feeling like that why am I typing this up and why don't I just go back to bed.  Well the answer is I am trying to have a life truth be told.  In about 2 1/2 - 3 hours I will be better.  Brain less foggy and body might even ache a little less and I might be able to venture out into the world.  I used to be out and about every day but now days I probably average 1-2 times a week going anywhere.  I can't handle loud noises, bright lights, or crowds very well anymore so I grocery shop in the middle of the night.  I go with my daughter and we shop a little, visit the book store or Starbuck's for coffee and I go to her house to craft and paint.  I lead a much different life then I did before the Fibro, CFS, and gluten issues took hold of my body.

I had 4 doctors appointments in January and I haven't the foggiest how much money was spent on x-rays, MRI, and blood tests.  I was told again that my orthopedic doctor doesn't believe in Fibro and that it is just a catch all for all the gripes about aches and pains...yes I will keep going to him because what he lacks in bedside manner he excels in diagnosis and treatment.  My rheumatologist told me that she now thinks I am truly a fibro victim (good word that) because she can see I am not faking symptoms but she can't find any medical basis for them but because I am on Medicare with BC+BS insurance they won't pay for any blood or radiography tests to prove it.  I get SSDI and I am sure to hell not in the market to pay for $800 - $1000 test to prove I have it  when the treatment wouldn't be any different if I had a positive test result.  $1000 is almost as much as I make each month and I am having problems just getting by as it is.   The bright side is I only have 2 doctors to visit this month and they are just follow ups to all the lab and stuff I am having done.  Joy!

I was nominated for a blog award and normally don't accept them but I figure that this blog has a lot of good information for me and others like me.  The blog is called "Fibro Fighterz" and has an online magazine called Fighterzine!  They are also on FaceBook trying to get the message out that those of us with Fibro are not alone.  Thank you Fibro Fighterz!  Now you guys go check it out!

On the bright side...Here is a recipe that I thought that I would share for my gluten free followers.  btw is they ask you at a restaurant if the gluten free is due to diet change or medical issues always say medical because they use different ways to process and cook the food to prevent gluten contamination.   These cookies are more then Yummy!  I would give them a 10 star in a 5 star rating system!

Gluten Free Homemade Nutter Butters
Prep Time: 15 minutes
Cook Time: 15 minutes
Total Time: 30 minutes
Yield: 10 -15 cookies depending on how thin/thick you make them.
Way better than store bought!

For the cookie:
  •  2 cups oat flour (gluten free all purpose or almond flour would work as well)
  • 1 cup + 2 T peanut butter
  • 1/2 cup coconut sugar
  • 2 T coconut oil
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  • 2 T milk (I used almond milk) You can add a bit more milk if the batter looks dry.1
  • 1 egg (I used a flax egg replacement)

For the filling:

  •  1 cup peanut butter
  • 1/4 cup maple syrup
  • 2 T coconut oil
  • Preheat the oven to 350.
  • Mix all the dry ingredients in a bowl.
  • In a saucepan, combine the peanut butter, flax egg, coconut oil, vanilla and milk.
  • Cook on medium heat until everything is well combined and the peanut butter is soft.
  • Set aside to cool down to lukewarm.
  • Once the peanut butter mixture is cooled, add it to the dry ingredients and mix until combined.
  • Form the dough into thin, long logs and place them onto a lined baking sheet. (see photo above for step by step instructions)
  • Use a fork to make the impressions on the cookies.
  • Use your fingers to push the sides of each cookie in at the center to shape them like nutter butters.
  • Bake them in the oven for about 15 minutes.
  • While the cookies are baking, add all the filling ingredients to a blender.
  • Mix until smooth.
  • Frost the cookies and form sandwiches after the cookies have completely cooled.
My cookies came out pretty thick. When I make these again, I will thin the amount of dough out that I use. I also initially added 1/2 tsp baking powder to the dry ingredients and I felt the cookies rose too much. That is why I left it out of the recipe.
If you want to cut the calories and sugar a bit, you can just fill the cookies with plain peanut butter instead of mixing up the sweet filling.

1 comment:

Anne said...

You have just described how I have felt today! Anne x